I am Jane , a caregiver in Taiwan. I have two children my eldest is Nena who is nine years old and my youngest is a Denver who is seven years old. I am a single mom, because I no longer have parents, my two children are left in the care of my aunt. My situation is difficult because my children are still young and I need to be away from them because their father does not provide support, so I am raising them on my own.
I always called and ask my aunt how they are and I send money monthly for their expenses as well as for their education. I trust my aunt a lot because I know she loves my children and will not abandon them. As for me here in Taiwan, I am taking care of an elderly woman. She has Alzheimer’s and she is often grumpy with me. Sometimes she throws her food away, sometimes she is often grumpy with me but I endure all of that because for my children. Our situation was like that everyday, even though naughty I just understood that because her daughter’s didn’t care about her anymore. So she was just so angry.
Until one day, my aunt called, they said they rushed my youngest to the hospital because there was a blood coming out of his nose. There I found out that my son had leukemia and it was serious and big money would be needed for treatment. I was depressed by what I heard, I burst into tears. I didn’t know what to do at that time. Moreover, my salary was not much. So I made a decision even though it was embarrassing, I put my face on it to beg my countrymen in Taiwan to gave me help and some were Taiwanese themselves.
I thanked God because I was able to quickly raise money for my son’s treatment but one night I received a call this is my aunt’s crying, she told that my son Denver is gone. She said that my son could no longer bear his pain and that it was getting worse. At that time, it was as if cold water had been poured over my whole body, I could not even move or speak and my whole body is shaking. I felt I was blank at that time and cried from the pain. I even blamed the Lord, why out of all the bad people in the world, why my son? He was so young and had so many dreams in life.
I was so depressed at that time. My reason for working hard in life was gone. I loved my son so much, why was she taken from me so early. I didn’t waste any time. I immediately told my boss that I was going home to the Philippines because my son had died. They allowed me to right away.
My flight home to the Philippines was about to take off and I was home in a few hours. I’m almost home but I don’t fell like stepping foot, I don’t feel like I can see my son in the coffin. As I get closer to us, I can see flowers and lots of lights and a coffin. I couldn’t help myself anymore. I started crying ang hugged my son’s coffin. My son, mom is here, why didn’t you wait for me? Mom did everything just to get you treated, but why did you let go so soon? I still have many dreams for you, my son. Now it’s just your sister and I because you’re gone.
What happened to my son was so painful. A few days later, he was buried. My sadness was unbearable but I had to continue for my daughter. I decided no to go back abroad so that I could be with my daughter. I wanted to make the most of the time I wasn’t by his side and I didn’t want to lose another child. So I didn’t want to be far from her. I had earned a lot of money to pay for my youngest child’s medical treatment, but it was not used because he was taken from us right away. So I decided to start a small business. I build a motor shop and later it grew and I was able to build my own house.
It has been five years since I lost my child. The pain is still there but I am gradually accepting it because I know that my child will not happy if I am always sad. I know that he is in the hands of the Lord now and he always watching us.
