I am Lemuel, working here in Kuwait as a foreman before I came abroad, I worked in Manila first. I have a wife and a child. In Manila, I can say that our situation is difficult because we buy everything and my child is always sick while my wife take care of our child. Sometimes when I am in need, I borrow money from my parents.
One day my mother called me to ask me to apply abroad because my cousin’s husband is looking for staff in a company in Kuwait. At first, I was hesitant because I would have to leave my wife and child behind but my parents said not to worry because they said they would take care of my wife and child while I was away. I took my family back to our province and was left in the care of my parents. Although it was against my will to be away from them, I endured it so that I could give them a good life.
I left abroad to work and every month I send money to my family. Three months later, my dad called me and said he wanted a new motorcycle so he could ride it. So I had him get a new motorcycle installment and I was the one who paid it every month. The next month again, my mother called and wanted me to fix their bathroom because they were having trouble using the bathroom. I sent them to have their bathroom repaired.
The next month, my mom asked for five thousand to pay off their debt. As for me, because I am a good son, I couldn’t deny them everything they wanted, I gave them everything. I even answered for my sister’s education who was in college, I sent her money until she finished in college. What I didn’t know at that time was that I was neglecting my wife and child because I put my parents and siblings priority. There was a time when I only sent a small amount to my wife because I put may parents needs first.
Four years passed and my contract abroad ended. I didn’t tell them I was going home to surprise them but I didn’t I would find my wife pacing the floor and being picked up by my mom. I immediately stopped my mother, I asked her why she was hurting my wife? She said she was slow to move so she got irritated. I immediately hugged my wife who was crying. That’s when I found out all the torture they had inflicted on my wife, when I left for abroad it was not here who received the money transfer but my mother, she said she took the ATM because she said, that my wife had no right to my money because we were not married yet. I also found out that my child was saving on milk, it was said that my wife wasted a lot of milk in making it so my mother made it.
They watched mu wife’s every move, including taking the slipper out of the back of the house. When my wife and my child returned home late, my mom and my sister would give her a terrifying lecture. There was even time when my sister embarrassed my wife at school, saying that she had no right to use their last name because we were not married yet, because a teacher had written my wife’s name with my last name. They had a home room PTA meeting and elected officers, In my four years abroad, I had no idea about my wife’s situation because whenever I called she always said that she was fine.
The next day, I told my wife to get dressed and we were going to City Hall. We will processing our papers and we will get married even if only with a judge, because I want you to have rights over me. I don’t like my family telling you that you have no rights. Ever since we courted and lived together and had child, you have had rights over me, all that was a missing was paper.
My parents found out that we had processing of our papers to get married but they were just as angry when they found out that we were getting married. We went ahead with the wedding with a judge and they couldn’t stop it. Since then, I decided not to going abroad because I did not have any savings during my four years abroad. I came home with nothing because everything went to my parents. I had them build a house, gave their a passenger tricycle and finished my sister studies who is now a teacher.
A week passed and my family and I separated. We are now living at my auntie’s house. They are not there so we are the ones who will be staying at home for the time being. I worked as a Raider now. Even though life is hard, I am still grateful to God because at least we can survive.
Now did I tell myself that I wish I had not poured everything into my parents, my situation would not be like this. Only now did I realize that they only love you when you have money. Now that you need one of them, you have no one to go to. Not even your sister who graduated from doesn’t look back at you. When you ask for help, there is always no money. So only now did I realize that it is hard to be a very kind son and brother.
